Take this site for example. I try to blog daily. I create a couple of podcast episodes each week. I give away free resources. Anyone can access that material and do what they please. Just this week, for example, to get my FREE 17-page “Comedy Blueprint Playbook,” someone subscribed, grabbed the free resource, then disappeared almost immediately. When I step back and look at it, it definitely felt rehearsed: Subscribe, download, run.

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My first reaction wasn’t great. There was a split second where it felt like something got taken from me. I spent time putting that workbook together, thinking through it, shaping it, making sure it was actually useful. Then it gets treated like a quick grab on the way out the door. In that moment, I was frustrated because that thought showed up whether I wanted it to or not.

BUT…I’ve learned not to sit there very long. The longer I stay in that mindset, the more it starts to mess with how I actually think about the work. I start drifting toward keeping things back instead of putting things out. I start thinking in terms of protecting instead of building or creating. In other words, that kind of mental shift doesn’t help anything I’m trying to do.

What helps me reset, then, is remembering what an exchange like that actually is. I’m not handing something out so I can trap people into staying. I’m putting something out there because I think it’s helpful and because I want the right people to find it. Some people will take it and move on. That’s part of the deal whether I like it or not. I’ve learned that, in life, not everyone who shows up is meant to stay. Others, however, are looking for something they can come back to. I would be making a huge mistake if I treated those groups the same.

So, the better move in any situation like this is to keep my focus where it belongs. The people who stick around are the ones worth writing for. They read, they think, they try things out, and they come back. That’s the group that actually helps give a little shape to what I do over time. But if I’m being real honest, I write and create because it’s meaningful and fulfilling to me. If I run into speed bumps, I just log it and keep going. I write the next thing, record the next episode, work on the next set. That’s the only part I can control anyway.

Now, let me ask you a question: Are you ready to level up in your comedy journey? If so, check out these resources:

• FREE - “The Round-Up”: My weekly comedy newsletter, choc-full of insights from videos, articles, and so on. This’ll also give you FREE access to “The Joke Blueprint Playbook.” Get the newsletter HERE.

• FREE - The Joke Blueprint Playbook: Act now and get an exclusive, 17-page toolkit that I designed specifically to solve some of the biggest joke-writing struggles comedians have. This comprehensive guide is packed with actionable advice, and it’s entirely exclusive to this community. Get it HERE.

• The Joke Writer’s Lab: Stop guessing at what makes people laugh. In this self-paced, online course, you’ll get the tools to find your unique comedic persona and learn the exact mechanics of writing a bulletproof joke. Get it HERE.

• The Comedian’s Memory Lab: Never blank on stage again!!! Learn my insider method to build and flawlessly memorize your entire set, whether you are doing 3 minutes at an open mic or headlining for an hour. Get it HERE.

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Before you go, let me ask: Are you ready to level up in your comedy journey? If so, check out these resources:

• FREE - “The Round-Up”: My weekly comedy newsletter, choc-full of insights from videos, articles, and so on. This’ll also give you FREE access to “The Joke Blueprint Playbook.” Get the newsletter HERE.

• FREE - The Joke Blueprint Playbook: Act now and get an exclusive, 17-page toolkit that I designed specifically to solve some of the biggest joke-writing struggles comedians have. This comprehensive guide is packed with actionable advice, and it’s entirely exclusive to this community. Get it HERE.

• The Joke Writer’s Lab: Stop guessing at what makes people laugh. In this self-paced, online course, you’ll get the tools to find your unique comedic persona and learn the exact mechanics of writing a bulletproof joke. Get it HERE.

• The Comedian’s Memory Lab: Never blank on stage again!!! Learn my insider method to build and flawlessly memorize your entire set, whether you are doing 3 minutes at an open mic or headlining for an hour. Get it HERE.

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With more experience, what I’ve come to see is that the best comedians actually don’t choose between those two. The best comedians prepare in a way that gives them something to stand on, but they also stay loose enough to move and be spontaneous when something better shows up. Now, don’t get me wrong: I still believe in writing everything out, from setups to punchlines to tags. I have a great process for that, which you can learn and adopt HERE. Personally, I need that structure, but I think most others do, too. And here’s where I say , “Without a process that let’s me prepare, there’s no way I’ll be successful in being spontaneous on the stage. I’ll simply be unprepared.”

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On a related note, I want to make the point that the moments people in the audience at a comedy show actually remember usually don’t come from what’s scripted. Typically, they come from something unexpected that happens in the room. I had a set last weekend where everything was moving the way I expected. Then a guy spoke up loudly and asked made a remark about Hurricane Helene, which I experienced a couple years back. I stopped, looked at the guy, sat down, and said something genuine, authentic, and very human in response. I hadn’t written any of that and, honestly, none of it was funny. But it was memorable. It didn’t rattle me though because I was prepared.

Again, that kind of moment doesn’t come from nowhere. And that’s the key! That kind of moment shows up because my preparation allowed me to make space for it. I’ve had to learn to stop gripping the material so tightly that I miss what’s happening right in front of me. It’s the difference between being a robot or a slave to the joke and being a real human. If I had locked into the next line and pushed forward without addressing that guy, I probably would’ve lost the room. There’s a chance I might’ve made it through the set, but I would’ve missed the chance to actually connect.

It’s all about being present. In an age where the phone screen constantly steals the conversation, being present is tough. And being present on stage is harder than it sounds. It means I’m not thinking three jokes ahead or running the setlist in my head. It means I’m paying attention to how people are responding, where the energy is shifting, and whether something unexpected just opened up. Most of the time, those moments pass quickly. If I don’t catch them, they’re gone.

I’ve had sets where things started to fall apart and the only thing that worked was acknowledging it in a way everyone could already feel. That kind of honesty can reset a room faster than trying to power through with material that isn’t landing. This is the case in my college classrooms, too. Being present and aware isn’t something a comedian can script, but it’s something every comedian can be ready for.

So, what this has done for me is change how I think about preparation. I’m still writing and refining, but I’m not trying to memorize every word anymore. I want to know the shape of the set, where it’s going, and where the turns are. Within that, I leave room to adjust. Some nights the written version goes exactly as planned. Other nights, I riff or shift mid-sentence because something in the room calls for it.

My point is: The material gives me confidence, and the room gives me direction. If I lean too far into one, I stand the chance of losing the other. When both are working together, the set and room feel different. What I mean is: It doesn’t feel like I’m running through something but like I’m part of something that’s actually happening right there in real time. And audiences can definitely tell the difference. They’ll laugh at a well-written joke, but there’s a limit to that. When something real happens in the moment, the response changes. It feels less like a performance and more like a shared experience.

Those are the moments people bring up later, not the lines I spent the most time polishing. I have a whole bit where I do crowd work in the middle of my set and at the end. After last week’s show, nearly every comment made to me as people left had to do with those moments. This, then, has become a kind of mindhack for me. I prepare enough that I don’t have to think about structure, and then I try to stay aware enough to respond to what’s real. That means pausing when I need to, letting a moment sit, or stepping away from the plan if something better shows up.

This also means being okay when things don’t go perfectly, because sometimes that’s where the best material comes from. I’m not trying to choose between scripted and unscripted anymore; I’m trying to hold both at the same time. The material gets me on stage, but the moments I don’t plan are the ones that stay with people. And the better I get at recognizing those moments, the more alive the set starts to feel.

Now, let me ask: Are you ready to level up in your comedy journey? If so, check out these resources:

• FREE - “The Round-Up”: My weekly comedy newsletter, choc-full of insights from videos, articles, and so on. This’ll also give you FREE access to “The Joke Blueprint Playbook.” Get the newsletter HERE.

• FREE - The Joke Blueprint Playbook: Act now and get an exclusive, 17-page toolkit that I designed specifically to solve some of the biggest joke-writing struggles comedians have. This comprehensive guide is packed with actionable advice, and it’s entirely exclusive to this community. Get it HERE.

• The Joke Writer’s Lab: Stop guessing at what makes people laugh. In this self-paced, online course, you’ll get the tools to find your unique comedic persona and learn the exact mechanics of writing a bulletproof joke. Get it HERE.

• The Comedian’s Memory Lab: Never blank on stage again!!! Learn my insider method to build and flawlessly memorize your entire set, whether you are doing 3 minutes at an open mic or headlining for an hour. Get it HERE.

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Takeaway #1: Be Ready: One of the first things that comes up in this episode is how strange (and pointless?!) comedy competitions actually are. And despite this show being exactly that, a comedy competition, the judges admit their irritations with comedy competitions in a way that feels honest. And I’m glad they do because I feel the exact same way. Every comedy competition I’ve ever been in has been a ruse. Anyway, right after that, the judges double down on the importance of a tight five. So, there’s a part that doesn’t change across the episodes. I appreciated the emphasis here on the fact that most opportunities, in life as in comedy, come in small windows. So, if those five minutes aren’t ready, nothing else matters.

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Takeaway #2: Be Personal: There’s a strong push in this episode toward being real and authentic on stage. They don’t really mean that in a vague way either. For the judges, it’s about making sure the material actually connects back to who the comedian really and truly is. I, for instance, have written plenty of jokes that worked in isolation but, at the end of the day, didn’t say anything about me. Those might’ve got some laughs, but they never went anywhere. The jokes that start to stick are the ones where the material feels tied to something personal.

Takeaway #3: Be Precise: This episode leans into joke density in a way that’s hard to ignore. Where they emphasize keeping things tight and active, many other comedians often talk about LPMs (Laughs Per Minute). While LPMs is not the most important metric, there is some value to it. Personally, I’ve been on stage and felt the drag of a long setup that doesn’t earn its space. But I’ve also experienced having a long setup then hitting the audience with a strong punch and a string of tags that made it worth it. A good rule of thumb, however, is when the time between laughs stretches out, the room is more likely to start to drift. Shorter setups force clarity, and that clarity typically makes the punchlines hit harder.

Takeaway #4: Be Prepared: There’s also a lot of attention given to how a comic handles themselves before they even get on stage. I’ve been that person pacing around, running through lines, burning energy before the set starts. What comes through here is that doing less can actually help more. If I walk up already drained, it shows. The best way to combat this? Be prepared. That is, plain and simple. Be prepared.

Takeaway #5: Be Cool: The last thing that stuck with me is how much composure matters in the moment. Things will go off script. Comedy shows are “live” and they happen in real time. Comedians have to be ready for that. The room won’t always respond the way they expect. What separates stronger performers is their ability to stay steady and adjust without letting it unravel everything. As a friend told me this past weekend, “You did a great job staying in the pocket.” That kind of control only shows up when the preparation is there. So, here’s what I’m keeping from episode 3:

1. Be Ready: A tight five still carries more weight than anything else;

2. Be Personal: Material needs to connect back to who I actually am;

3. Be Precise: Shorter setups help keep the room engaged;

4. Be Prepared: Energy before the set affects what happens on stage; and,

5. Be Cool: Composure matters when things don’t go as planned.

At the end of the day, this episode keeps circling back to readiness, which I think is so on point and so practical. In the comedy world, as in most of life, work has to be done before opportunities show up. Are you ready to level up in your comedy journey? Check out these resources:

• FREE - “The Round-Up”: My weekly comedy newsletter, choc-full of insights from videos, articles, and so on. This’ll also give you FREE access to “The Joke Blueprint Playbook.” Get the newsletter HERE.

• FREE - The Joke Blueprint Playbook: Act now and get an exclusive, 17-page toolkit that I designed specifically to solve some of the biggest joke-writing struggles comedians have. This comprehensive guide is packed with actionable advice, and it’s entirely exclusive to this community. Get it HERE.

• The Joke Writer’s Lab: Stop guessing at what makes people laugh. In this self-paced, online course, you’ll get the tools to find your unique comedic persona and learn the exact mechanics of writing a bulletproof joke. Get it HERE.

• The Comedian’s Memory Lab: Never blank on stage again!!! Learn my insider method to build and flawlessly memorize your entire set, whether you are doing 3 minutes at an open mic or headlining for an hour. Get it HERE.

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Are you ready to level up in your comedy journey? Check out these resources:

• FREE - “The Round-Up”: My weekly comedy newsletter, choc-full of insights from videos, articles, and so on. This’ll also give you FREE access to “The Joke Blueprint Playbook.” Get the newsletter HERE.

• FREE - The Joke Blueprint Playbook: Act now and get an exclusive, 17-page toolkit that I designed specifically to solve some of the biggest joke-writing struggles comedians have. This comprehensive guide is packed with actionable advice, and it’s entirely exclusive to this community. Get it HERE.

• The Joke Writer’s Lab: Stop guessing at what makes people laugh. In this self-paced, online course, you’ll get the tools to find your unique comedic persona and learn the exact mechanics of writing a bulletproof joke. Get it HERE.

• The Comedian’s Memory Lab: Never blank on stage again!!! Learn my insider method to build and flawlessly memorize your entire set, whether you are doing 3 minutes at an open mic or headlining for an hour. Get it HERE.

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Takeaway #1: One of the clearest threads throughout this episode is the need for a comedian to have a stable point of view. In other words, it’s not just having any POV, but holding the same one from start to finish. I’ve noticed in my own sets that if I drift, even slightly, the room feels it because I suddenly seem like someone different. In this episode, the judges (Kevin Hart and Tom Segura) keep pushing the comedians to stay anchored in who they are.

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Takeaway #2: There’s also a strong emphasis on specificity. This doesn’t mean just telling personal material, but finding details that actually belong to the performer. A joke that could come from anyone might work for a moment, but it doesn’t build anything. The stronger sets are the ones where it’s obvious and totally believable that the material couldn’t have come from anyone but the comedian holding the mic.

Takeaway #3: The conversation around payoff stood out more in this episode than the previous one. If a setup builds in a certain direction, the ending has to match or meet it. I’ve never really thought about that and think it’s a great point. I’ve built things up before and then let them fall short at the end and vice versa. But it makes a lot of sense: the punch should match the setup’s energy.

Takeaway #4: Structure shows up again, but maybe(?) in a more grounded way. It’s less about theory this time and more about whether the audience can stay with the set. When a comedian loses a room, it’s rarely random. They make the point that, when this happens, something earlier didn’t connect, and the rest of the set feels it. For more on this, see Takeaway #4.

Takeaway #5: On the performance side, pacing and presence come into focus. Silence comes up again, too, but here it feels more like a test of control. What this episode shows is that those moments of quiet can actually work if a comedian uses them the right way. Honestly, I think getting used to silence and then using it to one’s advantage is a super tough skill to master.

Takeaway #6: There’s also a simple idea that keeps surfacing: A comedian has to feel like someone the audience can settle in with. The can’t be overly polished and their material can’t feel forced. Steady is the key here. That said, here’s what I’m keeping from episode 2:

1. Point of view has to stay steady throughout the set;

2. The material needs details that make it feel like mine;

3. A strong setup needs a finish that matches it;

4. If I lose the room, the issue started earlier;

5. Silence can work if I don’t rush it; and,

6. Presence on stage affects how everything lands.

6 ways to sharpen a set! That’s what I’m taking away.

Are you ready to level up in your comedy journey? Check out these resources:

• FREE - “The Round-Up”: My weekly comedy newsletter, choc-full of insights from videos, articles, and so on. This’ll also give you FREE access to “The Joke Blueprint Playbook.” Get the newsletter HERE.

• FREE - The Joke Blueprint Playbook: Act now and get an exclusive, 17-page toolkit that I designed specifically to solve some of the biggest joke-writing struggles comedians have. This comprehensive guide is packed with actionable advice, and it’s entirely exclusive to this community. Get it HERE.

• The Joke Writer’s Lab: Stop guessing at what makes people laugh. In this self-paced, online course, you’ll get the tools to find your unique comedic persona and learn the exact mechanics of writing a bulletproof joke. Get it HERE.

• The Comedian’s Memory Lab: Never blank on stage again!!! Learn my insider method to build and flawlessly memorize your entire set, whether you are doing 3 minutes at an open mic or headlining for an hour. Get it HERE.

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Takeaway #1: In the first episode, the biggest thing that stood out to me was how much weight Hart puts on a “the tight 5,” that is, a comedian’s first solid five minutes. He harps on it in subsequent episodes, too. One of his main points is that those five minutes are an introduction. The audience should walk away knowing who a comedian actually is and not just that they can get a laugh.

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Takeaway #2: Related to that is the notion that comedy is about giving the audience something they can actually hold onto. The idea behind this is: If people laugh but can’t describe what a comedian’s about, they’ve missed something. Hart and his sidekick in episode 1 in New York City, Keegan-Michael Key, also hit on something I’ve seen repeatedly at open mics: comedians jumping from one angle to another just to chase a punchline. It might get a laugh here or there, but it feels scattered. If a comedian’s point of view keeps shifting, the audience doesn’t know what to trust. Consistency is key here because it’s what lets the audience (as well as the comedian) settle in.

Takeaway #3: Throughout the episode there’s also a lot of attention given to how surprise actually works. At several points there are vignettes where Hart, Key, Kumail Nanjiani, Tom Segura, and Chelsea Handler sit around a table and talk “inside baseball.” At one point, they discuss surprise and how it’s not cheap shock one should be after, but real misdirection. These little asides are a great feature of the show.

Takeaway #4: At other points, matters such as joke structure show up. Hart and crew talk about how a setup has to guide the audience toward a specific expectation, and the punchline has to break it cleanly. If that expectation isn’t clear, the turn doesn’t hit. It’s basic “Joke Writing 101” type stuff, but it’s always a good reminder. And, of course, I love sharing this kind of info myself, so I find it fun to view.

Takeaway #5: They talk about “the dismount,” too, which is just the closing moment of the set. That part gets overlooked more than it should. A weak ending can sometimes tarnish or undo everything that came before it. A strong dismount sticks with people after a comedian has left the stage. It’s the last impression; thus, it carries more weight than other parts of the set.

Takeaway #6: They also discuss the performance side of things, which is great. There’s a good bit of focus, for instance, on what they call “understood silence.” Many comedians rush through quiet moments because they think something’s wrong. What Hart and crew point out is that silence isn’t always failure; sometimes it’s space. If, as a comedian, I let silence sit for a second, it may well give the joke more room to land.

Takeaway #7: That, in turn, ties into confidence, which has a lot to do with a comedian not backing off of what they’re saying. If, for example, I launch into a joke then start softening a premise or hedging in the delivery, the audience feels that. The comedians who stand out are the ones who commit fully. They don’t apologize for the idea once they’ve started it. I also noticed the attention given to how stronger sets feel intentional all the way through. In these, nothing feels random. The jokes connect, the tone stays consistent, and the set builds toward something.

Having said all that, here’s a list of insights from episode 1 that I think are worthwhile:

1. The first five minutes should make it clear who I am, not just what I wrote;

2. The audience needs something specific to latch onto;

3. My point of view has to stay consistent;

4. Surprise only works if the setup actually guides the audience;

5. The closing moment needs to be deliberate, not an afterthought;

6. Silence can work if I let it; and,

7. Commitment in delivery matters more than playing it safe.

At the end of the day, the show keeps coming back to one idea: A set isn’t just a string of jokes, but a structured introduction to how I see the world. If that part is clear, everything else starts to fall into place. If it’s not, no amount of punchlines is going to fix it. As far as episode 1 goes, those 7 insights are really what stuck out to me.

Are you ready to level up in your comedy journey? Check out these resources:

• FREE - “The Round-Up”: My weekly comedy newsletter, choc-full of insights from videos, articles, and so on. This’ll also give you FREE access to “The Joke Blueprint Playbook.” Get the newsletter HERE.

• FREE - The Joke Blueprint Playbook: Act now and get an exclusive, 17-page toolkit that I designed specifically to solve some of the biggest joke-writing struggles comedians have. This comprehensive guide is packed with actionable advice, and it’s entirely exclusive to this community. Get it HERE.

• The Joke Writer’s Lab: Stop guessing at what makes people laugh. In this self-paced, online course, you’ll get the tools to find your unique comedic persona and learn the exact mechanics of writing a bulletproof joke. Get it HERE.

• The Comedian’s Memory Lab: Never blank on stage again!!! Learn my insider method to build and flawlessly memorize your entire set, whether you are doing 3 minutes at an open mic or headlining for an hour. Get it HERE.

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Are you ready to level up in your comedy journey? Check out these resources:

• FREE - “The Round-Up”: My weekly comedy newsletter, choc-full of insights from videos, articles, and so on. This’ll also give you FREE access to “The Joke Blueprint Playbook.” Get the newsletter HERE.

• FREE - The Joke Blueprint Playbook: Act now and get an exclusive, 17-page toolkit that I designed specifically to solve some of the biggest joke-writing struggles comedians have. This comprehensive guide is packed with actionable advice, and it’s entirely exclusive to this community. Get it HERE.

• The Joke Writer’s Lab: Stop guessing at what makes people laugh. In this self-paced, online course, you’ll get the tools to find your unique comedic persona and learn the exact mechanics of writing a bulletproof joke. Get it HERE.

• The Comedian’s Memory Lab: Never blank on stage again!!! Learn my insider method to build and flawlessly memorize your entire set, whether you are doing 3 minutes at an open mic or headlining for an hour. Get it HERE.

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In such instances, it can feel good and be easy to dismiss them. I’ve done it more than once. I’ll chalk it up to taste or standards and move on. But if I’m being honest, that move usually helps me avoid a harder question as it keeps me from asking why it’s working for them and not for me. And it really sucks asking that question. But in full honesty, the reality of the matter is simple: They’re connecting with an audience I’m not reaching yet. They have figured out how to keep people with them once they have them. I might not like how they do it, but the audience clearly does.

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What I’ve had to learn in light of this is to get and stay curious instead of being dismissive. Because being dismissive isn’t about what I would do differently; instead, it usually comes from ego. So, the better question I should ask is: What are they doing that works? I have to ask where I’m losing the room or what I’m missing in my own setup or delivery. Again, those types of questions totally aren’t comfortable, but they’re definitely useful.

This kind of snobbery, in my view, has usually been a form of self-protection. It gives me an easy out. I can tell myself I’m above something instead of admitting I haven’t figured it out yet. It also lets me stay where I am without feeling like I’m falling behind. But the longer I sit there, the more obvious it becomes that I’m not protecting anything; I’m just staying stuck.

Cards on the table: I’ve watched comedians I didn’t respect absolutely crush rooms I couldn’t connect as well with. My first instinct wasn’t to be curious about how they did it but to judge them. But what I was reacting to wasn’t their material; it was the fact that they had a connection with the audience that I didn’t have (yet).

So, here’s the mental shift, the mindhack: I don’t have to like what others are doing, but I do have to respect that they’ve figured something out. That’s why the moment I stop dismissing them and what they’re doing and start paying attention, things’ll start to change. I’ll begin to see where my own material falls short and notice gaps that were there the whole time. This, of course, isn’t about copying someone else’s style or lowering the bar. It’s about understanding why something works, even if it’s not what I’d choose to do. That kind of awareness sharpens everything and forces me to be more precise about what I’m saying and how I’m saying it.

At some point, I realized that the best comedians I know don’t spend much time being snobs. They pay attention to what works, even when it’s not their thing. They take what’s useful and leave the rest. Then they keep moving. Now, when that instinct to dismiss shows up, I try to pause and ask whether I’m actually critiquing their work or just protecting my own ego. That question doesn’t always feel great, but it’s usually the right one. Why? Because comfort often doesn’t help me improve but curiosity almost always does.

Are you ready to level up in your comedy journey? Check out these resources:

• FREE - “The Round-Up”: My weekly comedy newsletter, choc-full of insights from videos, articles, and so on. This’ll also give you FREE access to “The Joke Blueprint Playbook.” Get the newsletter HERE.

• FREE - The Joke Blueprint Playbook: Act now and get an exclusive, 17-page toolkit that I designed specifically to solve some of the biggest joke-writing struggles comedians have. This comprehensive guide is packed with actionable advice, and it’s entirely exclusive to this community. Get it HERE.

• The Joke Writer’s Lab: Stop guessing at what makes people laugh. In this self-paced, online course, you’ll get the tools to find your unique comedic persona and learn the exact mechanics of writing a bulletproof joke. Get it HERE.

• The Comedian’s Memory Lab: Never blank on stage again!!! Learn my insider method to build and flawlessly memorize your entire set, whether you are doing 3 minutes at an open mic or headlining for an hour. Get it HERE.

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Are you ready to level up in your comedy journey? Check out these resources:

• FREE - “The Round-Up”: My weekly comedy newsletter, choc-full of insights from videos, articles, and so on. This’ll also give you FREE access to “The Joke Blueprint Playbook.” Get the newsletter HERE.

• FREE - The Joke Blueprint Playbook: Act now and get an exclusive, 17-page toolkit that I designed specifically to solve some of the biggest joke-writing struggles comedians have. This comprehensive guide is packed with actionable advice, and it’s entirely exclusive to this community. Get it HERE.

• The Joke Writer’s Lab: Stop guessing at what makes people laugh. In this self-paced, online course, you’ll get the tools to find your unique comedic persona and learn the exact mechanics of writing a bulletproof joke. Get it HERE.

• The Comedian’s Memory Lab: Never blank on stage again!!! Learn my insider method to build and flawlessly memorize your entire set, whether you are doing 3 minutes at an open mic or headlining for an hour. Get it HERE.

But the punch usually isn’t the problem, the setup is. My contention is that setup does far more work than most realize. That’s why, when it’s weak, even a good punch can’t save it. And when it’s too strong, it feels obvious because the audience is already there. As we all know, the punch gets all the credit because that’s where the laugh shows up. But the setup is what made that laugh possible in the first place! It shapes the context, builds the expectation, creates the tension, and gives the audience something to hold onto. The punch just releases all that. So, if the setup isn’t doing that work, nothing else really matters.

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A strong setup does three things at once. It makes the situation/context clear, it sets a specific expectation, and it creates just enough tension underneath it. If a setup misses any one of those, the punch has to work harder than it should. And that’s usually, from what I’ve noticed, where the joke starts to struggle. Writers want to get to the funny fast but, in doing that, they often sacrifice clarity for trying to be clever.

On a related note, a mistake I see a lot, and I’ve made it myself, is overloading the setup. Too much information slows everything down and weakens the turn. A strong setup gives just enough information for the audience to get it and then gets out of the way. This is where the difference between good writers and bad writers, strong storytellers and weak storytellers, newer comedians and more experienced ones shows up. Newer comedians often tend to explain too much and try to be funny too early. But chasing laughs in the setup ends up softening the punchline.

More experienced comedians know how to play the setup straight and let the tension build. They trust the turn instead of forcing it. Another aspect of the setup is that it creates a shared assumption. When I’m writing jokes, I have to keep in mind that I’m guiding the audience toward a specific way of understanding and experiencing something. Once they’re there, the punch has something to break. But without that shared ground, the joke doesn’t really have anywhere to land.

Here’s a good rule of thumb: The more work the setup does, the less the punchline has to do. So, if you’re a joke writer, focus on the setup more than the punch. If you get a killer setup, the punch will likely fall into your lap. A question I ask myself is: Is there anything I can remove from the setup without weakening the joke? If so, if I can cut a line and nothing changes, it needs to go.

I’ve also learned to start with what’s emotionally true instead of trying to be funny right away. When joke writers force funny too early, they usually end up with something generic. When, however, they start with something real, something emotion-driven, the setup feels grounded. Working clean has reinforced this even more for me. I don’t have shock or edge to lean on, so everything has to come from structure, wording, and timing. If the setup is weak, there’s nothing to hide behind. It forces precision whether I like it or not.

The fact is: Jokes don’t fail randomly; they fail mechanically. And the mechanical failure begins with structural failure. When I teach my students writing, I make it clear that a poorly written paragraph doesn’t start with the paragraph; it starts with poor paragraph structure, sentence structure, and phrase structure. But when it comes to jokes, obviously everyone wants better punches. I get it; again, that’s the part people notice. But the comedians who actually improve understand where the real work is happening, namely, in the setup.

Are you ready to level up in your comedy journey? Check out these resources:

• FREE - “The Round-Up”: My weekly comedy newsletter, choc-full of insights from videos, articles, and so on. This’ll also give you FREE access to “The Joke Blueprint Playbook.” Get the newsletter HERE.

• FREE - The Joke Blueprint Playbook: Act now and get an exclusive, 17-page toolkit that I designed specifically to solve some of the biggest joke-writing struggles comedians have. This comprehensive guide is packed with actionable advice, and it’s entirely exclusive to this community. Get it HERE.

• The Joke Writer’s Lab: Stop guessing at what makes people laugh. In this self-paced, online course, you’ll get the tools to find your unique comedic persona and learn the exact mechanics of writing a bulletproof joke. Get it HERE.

• The Comedian’s Memory Lab: Never blank on stage again!!! Learn my insider method to build and flawlessly memorize your entire set, whether you are doing 3 minutes at an open mic or headlining for an hour. Get it HERE.

But what I didn’t see coming was what all that consumption was quietly doing to me on the other side of it or the underside of it. What I mean is, something kept feeling slightly off when I’d try to write jokes. I’d sit down to write, for instance, and I’d start a premise. But before I could finish my thought, someone else’s cadence would show up in my head. I felt like I wasn’t writing my own comedy anymore as much as I was negotiating with other comedians’ voices.

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What I’m getting at is, there’s a point where studying other comedians stopped sharpening me and started replacing me. I didn’t want to believe that at first because watching specials seems productive and just seemed like the right thing to do. But I also started paying attention to the comedians around me, the ones I was performing on shows with, the ones who had the most distinct perspectives. A lot of them were consuming far less comedy than me, not watching nearly as much, but were hilarious. I think they probably understood something that, at that point, I hadn’t figured out yet.

For example, when I constantly fill my head with how other people see the world, whether it’s preachers or educators or comedians, my brain can start solving problems the way they would. If I watch or listen to enough of them, maybe I reach for their tools instead of building my own. The realization that smacked me right in the face, however, was this: The audience feels that even if they can’t name it. It’s kinda like the difference between performing an original song and a cover. People always know which one they’re listening to, even when they can’t explain how they know. And it seems to me that the gap between those two poles is where a comedian’s credibility lives or dies.

So, I made a shift. I stopped watching other comedians right before sets. And I stopped binge watching specials before writing sessions because it was muddying the water at the exact moment I needed clarity. Instead, I started watching documentaries about comedians, their processes, their philosophies, and the way they think. That let me keep learning without filling my head with their actual material or style or voice. The shift was almost immediate in what it did to my writing.

I started trusting my own setups more than I had before. I stopped editing myself halfway through a joke and started taking risks that actually sounded like me, not what I thought a competent comedian was supposed to sound like. More importantly, it started to feel like mine in a way it hadn’t before which is huge because it changes how you show up on stage.

The real work of finding me in my own comedy happened mostly in silence. I mean that literally. It didn’t develop while I was surrounded by other performers doing their thing. It developed (and continues to develop) in the quiet moments when it’s just me. The freedom in that is that there’s no way to say someone else did it this way so I’ll do something like that. It’s just me and a blank screen or page trying to figure out what I myself actually think.

And, to be honest, that space is uncomfortable. But…it’s the right kind of uncomfortable. It forces me to sit with my own perspective long enough to hear it clearly. It removes the safety net of imitation and replaces it with something much more honest. Over time, that’s where my voice has actually started to take shape. So, heres’ the “Comedy Mindhack” for this one: Limit input when you’re creating output.

When I write, I still often ask myself a couple of questions to stay honest: 1) When I write a joke, whose voice do I hear delivering it in my head? If it’s anyone other than mine, that’s a problem worth stopping for; and, 2) I also ask myself whether I could go a full week without consuming any comedy at all. If that feels impossible, that usually tells me I’m leaning on outside input more than I should be.

Studying the greats matters, no doubt about that; I’m not walking that back. But there comes a point where each comedian has to stop asking what Person A or Person B would do and start asking what they themselves actually think. And let me tell you, that second question is the harder of the two because there’s no model to follow and nothing to hide behind. In that scenario, it’s just my perspective and whatever raw material my life has given me. But honestly, that’s the only place anything worth remembering ever gets made.

Are you ready to level up in your comedy journey? Check out these resources:

• FREE - “The Round-Up”: My weekly comedy newsletter, choc-full of insights from videos, articles, and so on. This’ll also give you FREE access to “The Joke Blueprint Playbook.” Get the newsletter HERE.

• FREE - The Joke Blueprint Playbook: Act now and get an exclusive, 17-page toolkit that I designed specifically to solve some of the biggest joke-writing struggles comedians have. This comprehensive guide is packed with actionable advice, and it’s entirely exclusive to this community. Get it HERE.

• The Joke Writer’s Lab: Stop guessing at what makes people laugh. In this self-paced, online course, you’ll get the tools to find your unique comedic persona and learn the exact mechanics of writing a bulletproof joke. Get it HERE.

• The Comedian’s Memory Lab: Never blank on stage again!!! Learn my insider method to build and flawlessly memorize your entire set, whether you are doing 3 minutes at an open mic or headlining for an hour. Get it HERE.

1. An Empty Calendar: I’ve said it before, quoting Joan Rivers who said it years ago, that nothing quite messes with a comedian’s head like looking at their calendar and seeing nothing booked. When the calendar’s empty, a comedian’s mind fills in the blanks with all kinds of questions and doubts. That’s why this one sits at the top.

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2. Stage Fright: This looks different for each person. Some can completely overcome it while, for many, it’s always there. Sometimes it’s nerves before a show or the thought days ahead of a gig, that everything can go south and fall apart in the next five minutes. When seasoned comedians appeal to “stage time” as a key to improving, this is a large part of the reason why.

3. Being Unoriginal: This one kind of creeps in the backdoor pretty stealthily the longer you do comedy. At some point, a comedian realizes that their “unique” thought might not be as unique as they’d hoped. They hear a bit that sounds close to their own, or they catch themselves leaning on something easy and familiar. But the fear of being unoriginal can force comedians to get sharper and help them catalyze ideas into something that actually sounds like them.

4. Bombing: No one signs up for it, but everyone goes through it to one degree or another. Just like there’s nothing quite like standing on stage and having an audience roar with laughter, there’s also nothing like standing on stage and feeling a joke die in real time. It’s brutal, but it’s also one of the fastest ways to learn. If a comedian can survive that, they can survive a lot…not just in comedy, but in all of life.

5. Forgetting Jokes: This one is pure panic when it hits, absolute panic. When a comedian’s mid-set, things are moving, and then their brain just…stops, it’s the worst. It’s like someone pulled the plug on their thoughts. It’s possible to recover from it, but in the moment it feels like everything’s unraveling. This fear is why preparation matters more than people think and why having a stable system is key. That said, you can check out my custom system in my online course “The Comedian’s Memory Lab.” Use it and never go blank on stage again.

6. Getting Heckled: It happens in clubs, theaters, and any venue out there. It even happens online. Some hecklers want attention or control, and some just don’t like whoever’s on the mic. Either way, it forces comedians to learn to respond in real time. There’s now hiding from it and, while “savers” are good to have, it can’t be scripted. How a comedian handles hecklers says a lot about where they are as a professional performer.

7. Getting Canceled: This is actually a modern version of a very old fear. A comedian might fear saying the wrong thing, being taken the wrong way, or having something pulled out of context, and suddenly everything shifts. Their career, name, and livelihood come under fire. That kind of pressure can make a comedian cautious in ways that don’t always help the work. So, figuring out how to navigate that tension is part of the grind.

8. Getting Rejected: This one comes from everywhere and should be expected. It comes from bookers, festivals, clubs, and opportunities you thought were a sure thing. A comedian puts themselves out there only to get a “No!,” or sometimes no response at all. And it’s easy to take it personally, even when it’s not. But let’s be real: Sometimes it 100% is a personal issue. Anyone who acts otherwise is lying. Over time, however, comedians have to realize that rejection is just part of the process.

9. Plateauing: This is one many might not think about. When comedians are getting laughs and getting booked but nothing is really moving, it can get concerning. The same set works, so they keep using it, but deep down they know they’re not growing. Then comes the realization that, at some level, it’s not failure. And that almost makes it worse. It’s just…being stuck. I’ve developed resources to help comedians avoid this altogether. The Joke Writer’s Lab, a self-paced, online course will give writers structure and tips for staying fresh. I’ve also created a weekly newsletter, “The Round-Up,” that’s full of tips, and which you can get when you pick up my FREE booklet called “The Joke Blueprint Playbook.” More resources are in the works!

10. Burnout: This one also sneaks up on comedians. What started as something fun turns into driving, promoting, coordinating, and dealing with crappy people. Comedians will keep performing, but deep down something feels off. Maybe the joy isn’t gone, but it’s buried under everything else. If comedians don’t pay attention to that, it’ll catch up with them.

Here’s a hard truth: Most of these fears don’t go away. Comedians don’t “beat” them and move on. They must simply learn how to carry them without letting them take control. Every one of these fears points to something that matters, which means they’re not just problems, they’re signals. So, if I’m paying attention, they tell me where I need to grow, where I need to adjust, and where I need to keep showing up. And in comedy, showing up is still the whole thing, but some people are scared of that, too.

Are you ready to level up in your comedy journey? Check out these resources:

• FREE - “The Round-Up”: My weekly comedy newsletter, choc-full of insights from videos, articles, and so on. This’ll also give you FREE access to “The Joke Blueprint Playbook.” Get the newsletter HERE.

• FREE - The Joke Blueprint Playbook: Act now and get an exclusive, 17-page toolkit that I designed specifically to solve some of the biggest joke-writing struggles comedians have. This comprehensive guide is packed with actionable advice, and it’s entirely exclusive to this community. Get it HERE.

• The Joke Writer’s Lab: Stop guessing at what makes people laugh. In this self-paced, online course, you’ll get the tools to find your unique comedic persona and learn the exact mechanics of writing a bulletproof joke. Get it HERE.

• The Comedian’s Memory Lab: Never blank on stage again!!! Learn my insider method to build and flawlessly memorize your entire set, whether you are doing 3 minutes at an open mic or headlining for an hour. Get it HERE.

Are you ready to level up in your comedy journey? Check out these resources:

• FREE - “The Round-Up”: My weekly comedy newsletter, choc-full of insights from videos, articles, and so on. If you subscribe, you’ll get access to “The Joke Blueprint Playbook.” Get it HERE.

• FREE - The Joke Blueprint Playbook: Act now and get an exclusive, 17-page toolkit that I designed specifically to solve some of the biggest joke-writing struggles comedians have. This comprehensive guide is packed with actionable advice, and it’s entirely exclusive to this community. Get it HERE.

• The Joke Writer’s Lab: Stop guessing at what makes people laugh. In this self-paced, online course, you’ll get the tools to find your unique comedic persona and learn the exact mechanics of writing a bulletproof joke. Get it HERE.

• The Comedian’s Memory Lab: Never blank on stage again!!! Learn my insider method to build and flawlessly memorize your entire set, whether you are doing 3 minutes at an open mic or headlining for an hour. Get it HERE.

That’s the case because criticism doesn’t just test a comedian’s material, it tests their identity, too. Criticism forces us to decide pretty quickly whether we’re going to be defensive, dismissive, or reflective. I’ve had moments where I wanted to brush it off and act like it didn’t matter, and other moments where I took it too personally and let it sit with me longer than it should have. Neither one really helps in the long run.

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Yesterday, as I was sitting in church listening to the sermon, the preacher made a point and, as he did, it brought to mind an old quote I’ve thought about many times over the years. It’s a line from Charles Spurgeon, a prominent preacher in the 1800s. He said, “If any man thinks ill of you, do not be angry with him. For you are worse than he thinks you to be.” If I could change it just a little bit to hit even a little closer to home, let me do so just to make a point: “If anyone speaks ill of you, do not be angry with them. For you are worse than they think you are.”

It’s a jarring statement, especially in a culture and business that tells us to protect our image at all costs. But the longer I sit with Spurgeon’s statement, the more I realize it’s about putting and keeping criticism in its proper place. In comedy, it’s easy to think every negative comment is an attack that needs a response. Someone doesn’t like your set, someone calls out a bit, someone questions your approach, and the instinct is to respond and likely defend yourself. Spurgeon’s point cuts right through that instinct.

The fact is: If I’m honest about who I am and where I’m at, then no single critique fully captures me anyway. Honestly, there’s a strange kind of freedom in that. If I know I’m a work in progress, then I don’t have to panic every time someone points out a flaw. I can listen, sift through what’s useful, and leave the rest without spiraling. As one of my old seminary classmates used to say about church folk critiquing pastors, “Take the meat, leave the bone.”

Obviously, I’m not saying I go looking for criticism or that I pretend it doesn’t sting sometimes. No doubt, some comments still hit harder than others, especially when they come from people I respect or when they land on something I already feel unsure about. But I’m learning that the goal isn’t to eliminate that feeling; it’s to not let it control how I respond or what I do next.

Comedy already puts enough pressure on comedians so adding the weight of every opinion on top of that is a quick way to burn out. There’s always going to be someone who doesn’t like what I’m doing, and sometimes they’ll be loud about it. That’s why Spurgeon’s statement has become a kind of mindhack for me. When criticism comes, instead of immediately reacting, I try to step back and remember that I’m not a finished product. I’m still figuring things out, still refining, still growing. I just happen to be the kind of person who does that publicly, who puts himself out there and lets others witness the process.

Now, I want to be clear: That doesn’t excuse bad work on my part, but it does put all of my work in context. And most importantly, it gives me room to improve without feeling like everything is on the line all the time. In a way, Spurgeon’s line doesn’t lower my standards, it stabilizes them by reminding me that my worth isn’t tied to a comment, a set, or a single performance. It also reminds me that, in a culture where any idiot can leave a hateful remark, I don’t have to win every interaction or prove myself to every person or anyone. I just have to keep doing what I do and prove myself to me.

In the world of stand-up comedy, there’s always more than enough criticism to go around. It’ll always be that way; it’ll never end. So, having a Spurgeon-like perspective in the middle of it all is important. If someone talks crap about me and says, for instance, that I suck at comedy or I’m not funny or whatever, I can just ignore them. Or, I can tell them or even just tell myself, “You know what? I might even be worse.” That doesn’t mean I hate myself, am beating up on myself, or getting down on myself.

This actually has nothing to do with whether I agree at all with someone or completely disagree with their remarks. This is about my response. That’s what matters. And this one perspective from Spurgeon helps keep me grounded and humble. It helps keep me grounded when things are going well and when they aren’t. It helps me take the meat and leave the bone. It helps me take what’s useful, ignore what isn’t, and move forward without carrying everything with me and, in comedy, that mental skill is priceless.

Are you ready to level up in your comedy journey? Check out these resources:

• FREE - The Joke Blueprint Playbook: Act now and get an exclusive, 17-page toolkit that I designed specifically to solve some of the biggest joke-writing struggles comedians have. This comprehensive guide is packed with actionable advice, and it’s entirely exclusive to this community. Get it HERE.

• The Joke Writer’s Lab: Stop guessing at what makes people laugh. In this self-paced, online course, you’ll get the tools to find your unique comedic persona and learn the exact mechanics of writing a bulletproof joke. Get it HERE.

• The Comedian’s Memory Lab: Never blank on stage again!!! Learn my insider method to build and flawlessly memorize your entire set, whether you are doing 3 minutes at an open mic or headlining for an hour. Get it HERE.

For a couple weeks, however, I’m going to shift to a single, jam-packed weekly newsletter called “The Round-Up.” Every Sunday, my plan is to send out one highly curated email. It’ll include a quick overview and direct links to all the week’s material from across my comedy ecosystem, everything from Substack, to the latest YouTube shorts, to the bi-weekly “Messed-Up to Set-Ups” podcast. I’ll also drop in occasional updates on my upcoming shows.

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Here’s what might be the best part: If you sign up and subscribe to the new weekly list, you’ll get FREE access to my brand new, exclusive 17-page resource “The Joke Blueprint Playbook.” It is packed with tips and insights to help take you from funny thoughts to funny jokes. If you’re already a subscriber and want a copy, shoot me a message in the comments or email me an I’ll get it to you.

Also, if you want to support this site further and get exclusive bonus content (including opportunities to meet online, access book chapters, and ask questions). Click the button now and become a Paid Subscriber.

A HUGE thanks to everyone who has supported me thus far!

Hello, Friends! It’s episode 108 of the Messed-Up To Set-Ups podcast. In this episode, I chat with industry insider, Barry Katz, who reveals how legendary comedians are masterful snake oil salesmen, convincing audiences that their material is worth passing on. We also get into why the puzzle of a joke must stay just out of reach for the audience to keep laughing. Barry also shares practical mindset tips that’ll help drown out noise, doubt, and negativity, all with stories about legends like Rodney Dangerfield and Andy Huggins. Whether you’re an aspiring comedian or a seasoned performer, this conversation will urge you keep fighting, laughing, and improving. Ready to craft jokes that puzzle and captivate? Hit play and step into the mindset of one of comedy’s best. Tune in!

Fact: The two biggest fears for any comedian are staring at a blank page without a punchline, and standing under a hot spotlight and completely forgetting the next joke. So, I built two completely online, self-paced courses to solve both of these problems permanently. Join the growing community of working comedians and first-timers who’ve already used these labs to completely bulletproof their sets:

• The Joke Writer’s Lab: Stop guessing at what makes people laugh. In this self-paced, online course, you’ll get the tools to find your unique comedic persona and learn the exact mechanics of writing a bulletproof joke. Get it HERE.

• The Comedian’s Memory Lab: Never blank on stage again!!! Learn my insider method to build and flawlessly memorize your entire set, whether you are doing 3 minutes at an open mic or headlining for an hour. Get it HERE.

Nobody really tells you this up front, but if you spend any time working in a church or on a college campus, you are going to develop thick skin whether you want to or not. In a way, that really sucks but it’s also the truth. I’ve worked in both contexts for much of my adult life. The thing is, you sign up for all the right reasons. You think you’re going to teach, lead, encourage, and maybe even inspire someone. But what you don’t realize on the front end of that is that you’re also signing up for unsolicited feedback from people who formed an opinion about you before you even introduced yourself. Now, add stand-up comedy into the mix, and suddenly all three worlds start overlap in ways that are really hard to ignore. That’s my story anyway.

I’ll start with the church, because that’s where I learned this first. While I love the church, there are things about “church people” that bother me. In general, the real and actual Christians I know are kind, generous, and genuinely care, but many of them will also tell you exactly what they think with a smile on their face. What’s crazy is, as a pastor, I’ve had people shake my hand and, in the same breath, tell me what didn’t work in my sermon, what felt off, or how things used to be done before I got there. It’s not malicious (well, sometimes it is), sadly it seems to be that’s just how it goes. Over time, pastors learn how to receive criticism from someone who is, at the same exact time, asking about their family and offering them a plate of food. It’s a real skill to be able to handle that, and it translates to comedy more than most people might think.

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Honestly, comedy crowds aren’t all that different once the setting is stripped away. The main difference is they are prone to completely skipping the pleasantries and getting straight to the point. When you’re a comedian who posts a clip online, for instance, nobody and I literally mean nobody, cares how long you worked on the material or how well it went somewhere else. They’re sitting there, arms folded, waiting to see if you can actually move them and, if you don’t, they’ll leave a stupid or hateful comment.

Then there are college students, which is its own kind of environment. I genuinely enjoy working with many of them, and I believe in many of them, and in what they’re capable of. But the relational dynamic has shifted. Authority doesn’t carry the same automatic weight it once did, and attention is something you have to earn every single time. A syllabus and the title of “Dr.” aren’t enough to hold attention or even get respect. As a professor, you’re competing with everything else in their world, and they’re not afraid to check out if you lose them.

As frustrating as it is in the moment, it has a way of being great preparation for comedy, even if it doesn’t feel like it in the moment. As a preacher, professor, and comedian, I’ve come to terms with this reality: no one owes me their attention. That’s true whether I’m in a classroom, a church, or on a stage. Every time I step up in front of people, I have to make the case that I’m worth listening to. And the repetition of doing that does something over time because it forces consistency. It also forces loads of self-honesty, because weaknesses get exposed quickly in these sorts of environments.

When I first started pastoring, an older pastor was mentoring me. It used to drive me crazy when he’d tell me i needed to develop thick skin. He was in his 70s at the time and had decades of practice while I was new to it all, but that didn’t matter to him. Over the past two decades, I’ve learned that thick skin doesn’t show up all at once, and it doesn’t come from one big moment. Thick skin builds slowly, through a series of smaller moments where things didn’t go the way I planned but I had to keep going anyway. Maybe a joke or story didn’t land, a point didn’t connect, a room didn’t respond, but I still had to finish what I started. That process is frustrating, sometimes super frustrating, but it’s also very formative. Over time, it creates a kind of stability that isn’t dependent on how things are going in the moment.

For the last two years, I’ve been teaching joke writing to my college student on a weekly basis. I have given them free reign to roast me. And they definitely take me up on the offer. Just yesterday in class, we were starting to write jokes and a student called me over to his desk to ask for help with his joke. He said, “I have a setup, but I’m struggling with the punch. Can you help.” I said, “Sure. What do you have so far?” He goes, “I can’t stand hearing Dr. Halcomb’s voice. That’s all I’ve got.” Literally, I’m his professor. And literally he’s asking me for help. Then, as we’re working with the setup he goes, “Ah, I’ve got it: I can’t stand hearing Dr. Halcomb’s voice, because I can’t stand toddlers.” He laughed. I laughed. Students around us laughed.

Then, I kid you not. A female student on the other side of the room raises her hand. I go over to her and she says she needs help. I tell her to share what she has. She says, “I can’t stand Dr. Halcomb’s class.” The girl sitting next to her goes, “I can’t either. Dr. Halcomb, you should just cancel this class today.” (Mind you, this student has taken my Comp I and Comp II classes and has been with me all year and has made that statement every single time she’s attended class.) My point is, many professors wouldn’t be able to handle these sorts of remarks in a way where they could just laugh at them. Many professors would or could never help their students write roast jokes about them.

Why? Because it’s scary. And in comedy many things are scary. Emailing bookers, bombing, stage fright, producing shows, nasty online comments, etc. But because I have a singular focus, nobody’s comments are going to derail me. No matter what anyone else says or thinks, I’ll keep going anyway. I’ve learned how to either absorb the hits or let them bounce off without letting them derail me. That kind of experience just comes with time and a steady stream of hard experiences like these. The thick skin forms in different settings but carries over to them all.

And honestly, once I realized that, everything started to feel a little more manageable. What I mean is, I’ve realized that, throughout the last couple of decades, I’ve not just been dealing with random tough moments, I’ve been shaped by them. And if I can handle a church lady who serves me meatloaf while critiquing me, or a college student who asks me to help them write roasts about me, I can handle whatever comedy throws at me, too.

Fact: The two biggest fears for any comedian are staring at a blank page without a punchline, and standing under a hot spotlight and completely forgetting the next joke. So, I built two completely online, self-paced courses to solve both of these problems permanently. Join the growing community of working comedians and first-timers who’ve already used these labs to completely bulletproof their sets:

• The Joke Writer’s Lab: Stop guessing at what makes people laugh. In this self-paced, online course, you’ll get the tools to find your unique comedic persona and learn the exact mechanics of writing a bulletproof joke. Get it HERE.

• The Comedian’s Memory Lab: Never blank on stage again!!! Learn my insider method to build and flawlessly memorize your entire set, whether you are doing 3 minutes at an open mic or headlining for an hour. Get it HERE.

Subscribe now

In developing joke-writing techniques, I know how to move through jokes and pretty much write, in a matter of minutes, jokes about anything. I know how to start and where the laugh is supposed to be. I can feel the rhythm before I even say it out loud. But one of the silent killers here, one of the enemies, can actually be familiarity because familiarity brings comfort. I can get too comfortable with my process. And if I’m never doing anything unfamiliar, anything new, I can start to get stagnant and not grow.

Of course, this isn’t just a comedy problem. More than anything, it’s a psychological problem. Psychologists call this a fixed mindset: a mentality where a person treats their skills as something to defend instead of something to develop. Thus, if I were to only write jokes that work or only try to write the perfect joke, I’d be protecting my identity as someone who is funny, instead of becoming someone who is getting better at being funny.

Because of this, I’ve found it helpful to think about my writing in two lanes. One lane is built for reliability, that is, the jokes that can carry a set when things feel unstable. The other lane is built for exploration, a lane for the ideas I don’t fully understand yet or that haven’t been as polished or developed yet. As one would expect, the second lane always feels riskier, but it’s also where growth happens. Approaching things this way is to approach them with what’s called a growth mindset, a mentality where failure is not a verdict, but simply information.

In a growth mindset, bombing still feels like failure when it happens; that part doesn’t change. The difference is: when I look back on bombing afterward, I’ll do so for information so I can improve. And it really helps to look at specifics, which many comedians are afraid to do because it may force some admissions about sucking in that moment. Maybe sometimes the setup wasn’t clear or I rushed. Maybe sometimes I assumed the audience was with me when they weren’t. That kind of feedback is uncomfortable, but it’s also precise and super helpful.

There’s another layer to this that took me longer to see. A lot of what I might call “bad sets” are really just moments where my expectations didn’t match reality. Psychologists also talk about prediction error, the gap between what we think is going to happen and what actually happens. I believe comedy lives, moves, and has its being in that gap. When the audience doesn’t laugh where I expected them to, that gap is not just failure, it’s data.

I had a bit about being a dad that I worked on for months. It wasn’t edgy or shocking. It was just honest in a way that made me uncomfortable. The idea was simple: As a parent, sometimes I don’t step in right away because I’m hoping the problem fixes itself without me. But I couldn’t get it to work. So, I softened it and tried to make it sound more reasonable. But every version of it stalled.

The first time I said it straight, without at all trying to clean it up, I felt a bit of hesitation. Of course, I could’ve adjusted it and made it safer, but I didn’t. I just said it. There was a pause, then a real laugh. It wasn’t a huge laugh, but enough that it felt like recognition. That moment taught me something: When a joke doesn’t work there are two easy reactions: 1) I can drop it and move on; or, 2) I can blame the room and protect my ego. Both feel good in the moment, which is why they’re so common among comedians, but neither one helps with improvement. What helps is going back and asking where I lost my way and the joke lost its shape.

And, instead of labeling the joke, bit, or set as bad, I try to reinterpret what happened. I ask questions like: Where did I lose them? What assumption didn’t land? What did I skip? Why am I talking about this? Because this sort of practice as a comedian shifts me from judgment to analysis, which makes it a lot easier to return to the material instead of avoiding it. And really, it’s never about the joke itself but what the joke reveals about me, and whether I’m willing to sit with that. Let me put it another way: I’m learning as a comedian, but also just as a human, that my job isn’t to avoid failure; it’s to work with and through it. But, of course, that only happens if I’m willing to write things that fail on a regular basis. So, it’s helpful to constantly remind myself that failure isn’t the opposite of success in comedy; it’s just part of how the whole thing works. So, go write some jokes!

Fact: The two biggest fears for any comedian are staring at a blank page without a punchline, and standing under a hot spotlight and completely forgetting the next joke. So, I built two completely online, self-paced courses to solve both of these problems permanently. Join the growing community of working comedians and first-timers who’ve already used these labs to completely bulletproof their sets:

• The Joke Writer’s Lab: Stop guessing at what makes people laugh. In this self-paced, online course, you’ll get the tools to find your unique comedic persona and learn the exact mechanics of writing a bulletproof joke. Get it HERE.

• The Comedian’s Memory Lab: Never blank on stage again!!! Learn my insider method to build and flawlessly memorize your entire set, whether you are doing 3 minutes at an open mic or headlining for an hour. Get it HERE.

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Fact: The two biggest fears for any comedian are staring at a blank page without a punchline, and standing under a hot spotlight and completely forgetting the next joke. So, I built two completely online, self-paced courses to solve both of these problems permanently. Join the growing community of working comedians and first-timers who’ve already used these labs to completely bulletproof their sets:

• The Joke Writer’s Lab: Stop guessing at what makes people laugh. In this self-paced, online course, you’ll get the tools to find your unique comedic persona and learn the exact mechanics of writing a bulletproof joke. Get it HERE.

• The Comedian’s Memory Lab: Never blank on stage again!!! Learn my insider method to build and flawlessly memorize your entire set, whether you are doing 3 minutes at an open mic or headlining for an hour. Get it HERE.