Why Every Great Joke Needs a Fight
Minding & Finding The Gap (Comedy Mindhacks #79)
Many aspiring comedians fail hard at first because, ironically enough, they’re trying to be funny. Go to an open mic, wait a few minutes, and you’ll see it. The problem will almost immediately be noticeable. They’re trying to be funny and it’s not working. In my view, that’s partially because comedy doesn’t start with being funny. By the same token, good jokes don’t start with being funny.
I’ve written about this many times albeit in slightly different ways, but I’ll say it again: being funny starts with finding the gap between expectation and reality. That gap is where tension lives, and tension is what gives life to every joke. When I work on new material and a joke isn’t landing, I look for one thing: the missing fight.
Let me walk you through a joke I recently started working on and is still under construction. I started with this premise, which is a true story (it’s always good to build jokes out of your true stories and experiences!): “After my last show, the news ran a story about it on the front page and it was the worst picture of me ever.” As you can see, that’s not a joke yet. It’s just a statement. And while it might be sorta funny, it’s not really that funny at all. It’s definitely not stage-worthy.
So, what did I do? I kept digging. I dug deeper into the gap between expectation and reality. The expectation of making the front page of the paper for my comedy was celebration. Front page coverage equals good press and typically that’s something to celebrate. The reality, however, was that the front page had an absolutely terrible photo of me. But “bad photo” isn’t funny enough. I had to get more specific. So, I analyzed the photo and tried roasting myself: I looked like I was having a stroke. Boom! “After my last show, the news ran a story about it on the front page and it was the worst picture of me ever. There I was, a picture of me… looking like I was having a stroke.”
Specificity like this amplifies the tension/conflict. When writers stay vague, they often end up avoiding the tension instead of exploiting it. One author, Joe Garza, refers to this as “gratuitous specificity.”1 He says, “this approach manifests when, instead of referring to vague things, ideas, people, etc., you’re overly descriptive or particular in your punchlines, which will increase the likelihood of your audience saying ‘I know exactly what you’re talking about!’” Because audiences won’t anticipate the amount of description you throw at them, it can create surprise which, in turn, generates laughs.
Back to my joke. As I said, it’s not done yet. I’m still building it. As I do, I keep looking at the front page of the paper in hyper-noticing mode. I see others’ photos alongside mine. They’re laughing, smiling, drinking, and their photos are great. So, I add details about the audience laughing while I look like I needed an ambulance. Then I make it permanent, noting that this photo of me is now archived forever for future generations to find. Then I shift from personal conflict to interpersonal tension and, suddenly, the photographer becomes my antagonist.
I start ruminating on revenge. What would that look like? Well, now I’m going to show up at his job like he did at mine, but with my camera, and I’m going to catch him in an equally terrible moment. You see, I keep excavating. And each layer I dig into adds a new angle of conflict. Benign Violation Theory2 explains why this works: humor occurs when a situation is both a violation and benign (not truly hurtful) simultaneously. It creates a psychological distance from the conflict for listeners so, ultimately, they can laugh at the fight/tension/conflict.
With all this in mind, when comedians say “nothing funny ever happens to me,” I can’t help but think they’re wrong. But it’s really even more than that. The deeper issue they have is with active noticing. That’s often caused by only looking for big stuff, huge events. But when you’ve trained yourself to be an active noticer, you survey whatever’s in front of you. Everything is potentially comedy. EVERYTHING! Much of it, in fact, is recognizing the small tensions already present in everyday situations. The gap between what we expected at the grocery store and what actually happened. The internal frustration when technology fails but we expect it to work. The interpersonal awkwardness of a bad interaction that we thought would go well.
The thing is, we shouldn’t go around and create conflict to try to get a joke out of it. The better way is recognize and amplify what’s already there. To help myself with this, I start with this question: What’s the gap between expectation and reality in this situation? Then I dig deep and try to find multiple angles. I keep going until I hit something that really lands. But ultimately, it’s in that gap where the joke lives.
Joe Garza, “The Art of Humor: Gratuitous Specificity” (June 24, 2019). Last accessed on 2/6/26: https://medium.com/the-reckless-muse/the-art-of-humor-gratuitous-specificity-5a19288af30d
Last accessed on 2/6/26: https://humorresearchlab.com/benign-violation-theory/.